Date nights are so much fun, me and Christian write ideas on the white board and go through the list. We both get really excited about date night because it’s time for us to reconnect as a couple and spend time with one another just being silly and really letting loose.

We like to do all sorts of date night activities such as bowling, which is our number 1 activity so far, Miniature golf, rock climbing, the movies the list goes on.

Until this one day in particular I found someone. I found a being so beautiful and so intriguing that it helped me reevaluate some of the traumas I have experienced such as sexual trauma and a sexual assault that happened on my 19th birthday. One day last week I was home and I was searching for tattoo conventions on YouTube like I usually do as least once a week. Being a tattoo and pierced momma I really enjoy the art. I saw a woman, so beautiful and so colorful and I had to find out more about her. I paused the video and saw her name in the background I was so excited that I grabbed my phone and I looked on Instagram to find her but I had no luck. I went to TikTok and searched her name and found an account that was hers. It was private and I followed her but I had to wait until she accepted it to see her videos. When she granted my access I then took my time watching her videos and liking as many of the ones that caught my eye. I was so enamored by her presence. Who is this gorgeous gal? I don’t know but I want to find out more.

I followed her Instagram link that was attached to her profile and followed it as well. where I scrolled through her page and saw that she would be in St. Louis in just a few days. She will be performing at a popular strip club and I knew I had to go. I was thinking to myself what are the odds of me watching a tattoo convention video from 2017, seeing this beauty, following her on social media and then seeing that she was going to be in town only a few days later, what a synchronicity.

I call my partner and suggest to him date night at the strip club to meet this woman, I send him pictures and he’s like sure we can most definitely go. This will be our first time going to a strip club together. I am not a person who goes to clubs anymore I like to be home with my babies sipping tea. This night, this night was an exception. I call one of my dearest friends and ask her to come along so she can meet her as well and so we can also support our friend who is also a dancer at the club.

The night has come and we head out to the club we sit at a table near the stage and we had $100 in ones to support and tip the dancers because what they are doing is an art and it deserves to be appreciated and admired. I look at the dancers on stage and I see true talent in the rawest form. Completely naked of their clothing, bras and panties but they still looked clothed to me. Many times I would make eye contact with the dancers and a few of them came over to me to compliment me, that made me feel really good. Dancing, spinning and floor pounding it was something to it that made me feel like it wasn’t a sexual experience. Yes, I understand a strip club, nudity and gawking is used to provoke a type of sex and sex selling imagery. In my eyes that’s just one way to view it. I didn’t know these women by names, other that my friend and the featured guest who I was coming out to see and support in the first place. So I felt that was the imaginary blanket that cloaked their vessels. Seeing their faces and how they expressed themselves on stage, they were performing, acting and enticing the crowd. Even as my friend took the stage I looked at her as if I would any other circumstance.

My point being for me is nakedness and true exposure is knowing the soul inside that vessel, that human being outside of the club, knowing their names, likes, dislikes, dreams and admirations. That’s my definition of naked. I felt so empowered by these women, these are and were their bodies and they are in control of them. They decide if you touch them or not, see them or not, hear them or not. That brought me back to my traumas and now feeling empowered and telling myself, Hey! no one takes your power away from you. Take back your ownership and tap into that alluring Femininity. This is my body and I may do with it as I please. I have a new outlook on live and who would of thought it would show itself at the strip club.